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Author: Carrie-Ann Barrow

How I’m not overcommitting this holiday season.

Written by Carrie-Ann Barrow on . Posted in Carrie-Ann Barrow, Finding Purpose, Passion and Prosperity, For Leaders, Personal Development, Professional Development, Prosperity, Purpose, The Queen’s Decree.

Hey Queen,

Ah! It’s time. November. School’s back in session and it’s time to start thinking about hosting dinners, holiday parties, exchanging gifts, and pulling it all off without feeling stressed. Because as always, you have somehow found yourself to be the party planner on top of everything else.

I’ve been there. I still am guilty of overcommitting during the holidays, and this is what I’m doing to actively prevent myself from doing that. I hope these reminders and tips help you stay calibrated and as relaxed as you can this holiday season.

Say NO.

It’s always my number one. I need to be better about saying no, and I’m sure you do too. Remember to keep an updated calendar with all of the obligations that you are happy to take on first. If you find it full and something comes up? DON’T negotiate. Either reallocate your priorities to make room or say you’re not available. It’s never worth the stress and there’s nothing wrong with passing something up or rescheduling to meet up another time.

Celebrate & Strategize.

This time of year is always a whirlwind. So make sure that between the holiday lights and festive tunes, toasts and the turkeys, you take a moment to reflect on your year. Jot down your valuable lessons and inspirational triumphs so you have them for the upcoming year. It’s not just about gearing up for festivities, but also gearing up for a proactive year ahead. Embrace the season as a bridge between valuable past insights and future engaging strategies.

Schedule self-care.

Do you have your budget for self-care? You should! Make sure that the budget is available for you year-round, especially during the holidays when you’ll be spread a little more thin! Make sure you’re taking deep breaths periodically throughout the day, checking in with your heart, taking walks, and having some time alone to read or journal. You need this! Self-care is a necessity, it isn’t a gift.

Laugh.

This may seem obvious… but I tend to forget to just shake things off. Stuff falls through the cracks, mistakes happen, and it’s okay. Nothing needs to be perfect. If you find yourself overwhelmed or feeling guilty, remind yourself of the peace you deserve and watch a funny video.

November is a strange month. We’re just getting into the swing of things with school and then it’s time to shake everything up with the holidays. Queens, don’t sweat it. Life is too short. Stop feeling guilty for actually trying to make the most out of this season.

Oh! You also have my permission to nag your partner, friends, kids, or whoever is in arm’s reach for help, because doing this all solo is so last year.

XOXO,

budgeting self-care

Is self-care in your budget?

Written by Carrie-Ann Barrow on . Posted in Carrie-Ann Barrow, Finding Purpose, Passion and Prosperity, For Leaders, Personal Development, Professional Development, Prosperity, Purpose, The Queen’s Decree.

Queen,

I’m going to talk about something that’s often overlooked, but crucial for your personal and professional journey: budgeting to invest in YOURSELF.

In our fast-paced world, it’s easy to get caught up in the daily grind, sticking to your budget, and putting your well-being on the back burner. But here’s the truth: your life, professional and personal, is going to be a marathon. Not a sprint. The reality is that I’ve seen strong women collapse under their own expectations and burnout.

Self-care matters. It improves our mental health, inspires new ideas, and allows us to be clear-headed when turbulent times come – because you know they will!

If you look at your current budget and don’t see a fund for your self-care, that needs to change immediately.

I’ve worked with many strong women who have never considered setting money aside for themselves. They can’t fathom a spa day, a shopping spree, or just scheduling a quiet afternoon to themselves.

I want you to challenge yourself by looking into your income and setting aside 3% of your income for YOU. Whatever that looks like!

Settle your worth, too. Do you believe you’re worth 3% of your salary? Can you fathom setting aside 5% or 10%? This is completely up to you and what your budget allows. My point is that we can spend our entire working careers being spread thin, underappreciated, and pushed to burn out if we don’t look out for ourselves.

Value yourself. Value your time. Value your self-care.

By budgeting for self-care, you’re making a commitment to your own well-being, and that’s a decision that will pay dividends in every aspect of your life. Go ahead, embrace self-care, invest in yourself, and evolve every aspect of your life.

XOXO,

Embrace Your Inner Queen: The Art of Self-Investment

Written by Carrie-Ann Barrow on . Posted in Carrie-Ann Barrow, Finding Purpose, Passion and Prosperity, For Leaders, Personal Development, Professional Development, Prosperity, Purpose, The Queen’s Decree.

Queen,

As the brilliant late summer sun casts its long, golden shadows, I’m reminded that just as nature effortlessly moves through her cycles, we too must embrace the transformative power of self-reflection and growth. Queens, this month, as we anticipate the coming retreat in November, let’s delve deep into what it genuinely means to prioritize ourselves. Investing in oneself isn’t about occasional indulgences; it’s a lifelong commitment to our purpose-driven journey.

Where Do YOU Feature in Your Budget?

When we sit down, pen in hand, to chart out our monthly expenses, do we account for our self-care? Not just the fleeting luxuries but the very essence of self-love and self-growth? In our meticulously planned budgets, it’s time we mark a dedicated space for our mindset nourishment, our visionary aspirations, and our desires to live life on our own terms.

Reflect on this, Queens: If that opulent spa day or that exclusive retreat costs you a mere 5% of your monthly earnings, isn’t that an investment in your well-being, your peace, and your rejuvenation? Isn’t gaining clarity around what you want the ultimate power move?

The Power of the Purse: More Than Just Money

Financial acumen isn’t just about numbers; it’s intertwined with our life’s aspirations. Every dollar you set aside for yourself, be it for a book, a course, a vacation, or even a quiet evening of solitude, echoes a profound mindset — you are valuable, and you deserve it.

A budget line for self-care? It might sound avant-garde to some. Yet, for the Queens who’ve realized that they’re their most significant assets, it’s a non-negotiable. It’s a tangible affirmation of their worth and a testament to their commitment to personal growth, both professional and spiritual.

Self-investment isn’t merely a financial term; it’s a life choice. As autumn unfolds, let us remind ourselves of our worth, bask in our desires, and make intentional choices that align with our heart’s deepest yearnings. After all, to live regally, one must invest in her own crown.

Sincerely,

Elevate Your Leadership as a Queen

Harnessing the Power of DiSC®: Elevate Your Leadership as a Queen

Written by Carrie-Ann Barrow on . Posted in Appoint Your Royal Court, Carrie-Ann Barrow, For Leaders, Professional Development, Prosperity, The Queen’s Decree.

Queen,

In the realm of leadership, effective communication and collaboration reign supreme. As Queens, we understand the importance of building strong teams that can conquer any challenge. That’s why I recommend turning to powerful tools like DiSC® to enhance work dynamics and create a harmonious kingdom.

Discovering the Language of Success

As a Queen, you possess unique gifts and talents that contribute to the success of your team. However, sometimes it can be difficult to recognize and articulate these attributes. The DiSC® assessment serves as a language, helping us understand our behavioral style and communication preferences. By gaining this insight, we can express our strengths with confidence and align our efforts for maximum impact.

In our modern-day kingdoms, collaboration is the cornerstone of success. With the insights from the DiSC® assessment, powered by Wiley, you can bridge communication gaps and foster a culture of collaboration. Understanding the communication needs of your team members allows you to tailor your approach, ensuring that your message resonates and inspires action. By embracing the power of DiSC®, you build a kingdom of collaboration that thrives on mutual understanding and respect.

Step Into Your Reign as a Master Communicator

As an authorized reseller, certified practitioner, and facilitator of DiSC® through my partnership with Wiley, I invite you to take the DiSC® assessment through Scaling Strategies today. Discover powerful insights that will allow you to unlock the full potential of your work teams. You will also gain ongoing access to Wiley’s online training center, connecting you to course content, fellow Practitioners, and Wiley’s education specialists as part of my partnership with them.

Whether you’re looking to become DiSC® certified yourself, take a workshop, or simply want to explore new areas of yourself and your business, I am here to support you on your journey and work with you to break the glass ceiling. Embrace your Queen energy and lead your teams with the confidence and grace befitting of a true ruler.

Sincerely,

Claim Your Throne: The Power of a United Royal Court

Claim Your Throne: The Power of a United Royal Court

Written by Carrie-Ann Barrow on . Posted in Appoint Your Royal Court, Carrie-Ann Barrow, For Leaders, For Women, Professional Development, Taking Control of Your Kingdom.

Queen,

As the leader of your kingdom, there are times when the crown can feel heavy. Leadership, though rewarding, requires a particular mindset. The vision of your reign can often become blurred by isolation. This solitude often springs from our lofty positions; when we stand at the helm, we might struggle with clarity around what we want. The solution to this loneliness? A trusted circle of peers or, as I prefer to call it, your very own Royal Court.

Embracing the Power of Masterminds

Masterminds, trusted circles of like-minded individuals, are the secret weapon for any effective leader with ambition. Why? Because they provide a safe space for productive challenge, candid conversations, and mutual support.

Remember, at the executive level, honest feedback can be scarce, and fear can hinder open communication. In your Royal Court, however, transparency and confidentiality reign supreme. Imagine being able to leave your doubt at the door, share your concerns, and navigate conflicts with individuals who not only respect your voice but also understand your journey. That’s the power of a trusted peer network.

Your Royal Court mirrors a mastermind or an executive group in the corporate world. It’s more than just a professional network; it’s a circle of honesty, where every member is dedicated to helping each other thrive. It’s about constructive conflict, growth, and the conviction to hold each other accountable.

As we head towards the fall, the excitement of launching my Royal Court Program resurfaces, much like it did last year in September. An initiative designed to empower women, break through lies, break down barriers, break the glass ceiling, and break through fear by exemplifying the power of a peer network. If you’re feeling the tug of leadership loneliness, remember: your Royal Court is ready to be formed, and your throne is waiting.

Stand Unapologetically in Your Power

In your purpose-driven journey to embody your regal power and stand in command, remember, “If you decree it, you will be it, and they will see it.” Know your worth, embody it, and fight for it. Harness your Queen energy, stand unapologetically in your power, and find your wealth and worth in the heart of your Royal Court.

Let’s embark on this action-oriented journey together. Are you ready to assemble your Royal Court? Learn more about this in my book The Queen’s Decree. 

Sincerely,

Command Your Space Unapologetically, My Queen

Command Your Space Unapologetically, My Queen

Written by Carrie-Ann Barrow on . Posted in Bring Out The Queen, Carrie-Ann Barrow, For Entrepreneurs, For Leaders, For Women, Personal Development, Professional Development, Self-Awareness, The Queen’s Decree, Unapologetic Queens.

Queen,

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you are owed respect, yet you’re the one who feels obligated to apologize? To bend to the whims of others, even when they have wronged you? If this resonates, it’s time for a change. It’s time for you to start Commanding Your Space Unapologetically.

Unapologetic Command: The Birthright of a Queen 

Society often conditions us, as women, to downplay our needs, to swallow our pride, to smother our voice. But Queen, this is not our destiny. We are not here to feel small or to let others trample over our boundaries. We are here to shine, to lead, to command our space.

It starts with recognizing our worth. What are your non-negotiables? What are the boundaries you need to set for yourself to feel respected and valued? These are not selfish demands but rather assertions of your rights. Recognizing your own worth and commanding respect for it is the first step to harnessing the Queen energy you possess.

Next, we need to communicate our needs and boundaries, unapologetically. This doesn’t mean disregarding the feelings of others, but rather expressing our needs with firmness and tact. You don’t owe anyone an apology for demanding respect and asserting your boundaries. You owe it to yourself to live authentically and unapologetically.

Unapologetic Doesn’t Mean Rude

Being unapologetic doesn’t mean being disrespectful or dismissive of others. It means standing up for your values, your rights, and your dignity, while still respecting the humanity of others. It’s a delicate balance, but one that’s essential for maintaining your self-respect and commanding your space.

Remember, Queen, you are the ruler of your life. You have the power to demand respect, to set your boundaries, to speak your truth. Embrace this power and let it guide you to a life of unapologetic authenticity.

For further guidance on this journey, check out my book. It’s a powerful resource to guide you towards commanding your space, unapologetically.

Sincerely,

Self-Advocating-Queens

Self-Advocating Queens

Written by Carrie-Ann Barrow on . Posted in Carrie-Ann Barrow, Developing Queen Confidence, For Entrepreneurs, For Women, Professional Development, The Queen’s Decree, Unapologetic Queens.

Queen,

Do you dread when promotions roll out in the workplace? Or when you have to “sell” your achievements and contributions such as in a presentation or interview? You are not alone, this can be a common trait among us Sister Queens. But why is this? And what can we do to harness the Queen energy we have put the work in to manifest?

Becoming a Self-Advocating Queen, Unapologetically

Most of us Queens were raised in an environment where humility, quietness, and praising the efforts of others were valued. Coming from this, it can be a hard habit to embody our own confidence. Sometimes the person we need to give credit to is ourselves. When we recognize our own contributions to success at home, in the workplace, and elsewhere in our lives, we affirm our worth and our wealth.

What is your superpower? What are your gifts? What do you bring to the team that is essential to success or leadership? It can be hard to recognize these attributes in ourselves, but some self-reflection, mantra work, and asking others how they perceived a project and the individual contributions can help.

Noticing your contributions is the first step towards becoming the Queen you are meant to be. Nothing in the workplace is accomplished alone – what role did you play?

Next, you need to speak up about your strengths. What are the specific examples of your efforts in the most recent project? Why was this important? Helping others see from your point of view is a major step in owning your Kingdom and asserting your royal birthright.

Always More Than Enough

No matter your experience level, thoughts that say you aren’t enough can creep up – you may not have as much experience as your role models, or maybe you feel like you aren’t an expert yet in your field. These pesky thoughts are a sign of imposter syndrome, and they do not serve you. No matter where you are on your path, you have made it here, and here is a good place to be. You have done the work. You have come to the right place, and from here you can go anywhere. For more inspiration, check out my workbook. This will help you on your path to manifest your Kingdom. You have the drive and the passion, now is the time to roll your shoulders back and put your chin up. Harness your Queen energy and do all you do with the confidence of royalty.

Sincerely,

Queen, You Are Picture-Perfect

Written by Carrie-Ann Barrow on . Posted in For Women, A Queen’s Guide to Self-Care, Bring Out The Queen, Carrie-Ann Barrow, Developing Queen Confidence, Personal Development, Regal Coaching, Self-Awareness, The Queen’s Decree, The Royal Treatment. No Comments on Queen, You Are Picture-Perfect

Hey Beautiful Queen,

When is the last time you looked in the mirror and saw yourself as beautiful, and dare I say it, perfect?

Based on my personal experiences and those of the Queens I’ve coached, it may have been a while. Perhaps you can’t think of a time you’ve ever felt that radiant. First and foremost, know that you are stunning inside and out — whether or not magazines, television shows or movies visibly reflect the most gorgeous parts of you.

While we’re making progress, our society and culture still identify thin waists, long hair, curvy figures and small noses as the beauty standard. This emphasis on B.S. ideals makes us feel “less than” — less than perfect, less than worthy, less than desirable. The feeling sucks. And know, my Royal sister, that you are not alone. According to the Dove Self-Esteem Project, only 4% of women across the world consider themselves beautiful. Let that sink in – 96% of women across the world don’t realize their their own beauty. How is that possible?! When I look at my Royal Court of friends, colleagues and family, I see nothing but gorgeous Queens.

How Do You See Yourself?

Throughout most my life, I carried the common definition of beauty in my head, one that we as women are indoctrinated to believe. I mean, we still have beauty contests for fucks’ sake! FOR KIDS! We’re taught to see beauty as competitive, comparative and transactional — and that it only exists on the outside. That’s a definition of beauty that feels precarious. It’s the kind of beauty that can’t leave the house without being coated in heavy makeup or relies on ridiculous Instagram filters to feel valued. This is a beauty defined by the absence of imperfection, and one that robs us of confidence. Over the years I’ve learned, in part through photography and the work of brilliant photographers, that my beauty is defined by me, and me alone.

Capture Reality And Build Confidence

Years ago, I revamped my website, and needed new corporate photos. I’d just started doing the inner work, and wanted to lean into actually “seeing” myself as bold, beautiful, confident, and capable. I hired a photographer who took the time to learn about who I was, what I valued and what I wanted for myself — before she even picked up her camera. She encouraged me to do more than take professional headshots and to consider photos of all sides of me – badass yet soft, sexy yet sweet. The resulting images were of a Queen who is all those things. And damn, was she beautiful — it took a moment to believe that it was me in those photos! As mentioned, I had just started doing the inner work and was still learning about my own beauty, my own power. Those images, when I need it, are my go-to for “seeing is believing,” when I need a reminder that all I am on the inside, I am on the outside.

More recently, I did a photo shoot to celebrate the release of The Queen’s Decree and worked with photographer Dena Meeder — and she feels as strongly as I do about helping women develop Queen Confidence. It was an amazing experience!! As you can see in that photo collage below, Dena brought out my full royalty – my Queen Elizabeth I, my Marie Antionette, my Bad-Ass Monarch, my Playful Sovereign — all of Queen Carrie-Ann Barrow! Now, while I wouldn’t leave the house in that Marie Antionette wig, I had a lot of fun playing in the studio and seeing myself in literal Royal attire. Remember, it’s a visual representation of how I feel on the inside. When I look at those photos, my crown is shining bright inside and out, and so is my confidence!

The confidence that photography can help create has nothing to do with the camera. It had to do with showing up fully and working with Queens like Dena that see all of you just as you are — stunning, strong, brilliant and Royal!

Surprise Yourself, Queen! You Deserve It.

One of my Queen clients is a sixty-something entrepreneur that was advised to make her website more personal by using photos of herself instead of stock photos. She had procrastinated for months, as she dreaded the thought of being photographed (been there!).

She shared that she hated the way she looked in photos. All she could think about was how “perfect” she was in her early twenties and kept comparing her sixty-something body to her twenty-something body. I asked what she loved about herself back then besides what she could see on the outside. She loved her lightheartedness, her sense of adventure, the way she loves deeply, her willingness to take risks and so much more. What she described are the Values she holds — the jewels in her crown — and she still has all those things! We worked on how to present them on the outside because that is what really makes a person attractive.

We talked about how to bring those gems into view today and in images of herself. Her lightheartedness began to show up and we had so much fun talking about poses, wardrobe, scenery. I then challenged her to consider adding boudoir to her photography plans. This was a stretch, I knew that, and I also knew, based on my own experience, that it can bring out a side of a woman that we dutifully hide based on societal pressures. Truth is, she’s dying to be seen. I wasn’t suggesting this for her website. I was suggesting that she do this for herself to see that sexy side of her that she loved so much in her twenties. She took a deep breath and then, she smiled big and agreed. She texted me a couple of weeks later and shared that simply arranging the session has already boosted her confidence. (HELL YES!)

She had a ball selecting the perfect outfits and accessories and allowed herself to be the star of the show. Through the tool of photography, her Queen is coming to life! She’s bringing all her inner gorgeousness to the outside, so she can celebrate herself. My heart explodes as I think about the confidence, she was manifesting by giving herself permission to be what she already is, absolutely beautiful.

I encourage you to give this a try, Queen — you are beautiful inside and out! Stay tuned for an email from me with exciting news coming soon. Dena and I are working together on a women’s retreat this coming spring where attendees will have an opportunity to be photographed in their majesty. You won’t want to miss it!

Sincerely,

Queen Energy

Written by Carrie-Ann Barrow on . Posted in For Women, Bring Out The Queen, Developing Queen Confidence, Personal Development, Professional Development, Self-Awareness, The Queen’s Decree. No Comments on Queen Energy

Hey Queen,

Queens like us have a lot to accomplish — and wear a lot (I mean, a lot) of crowns! From Queen of our Kingdom to partner, mother, CEO, leader, co-worker, teacher, friend, daughter and so many others, our roles are as vast as our Kingdom. In Chapter 7 of my book, The Queen’s Decree, I talk about forming your royal court. We accomplish this by first allowing each of these separate, yet essential, roles to be allies, or “besties” if you will. When each of our previously competing roles band together, we give ourselves permission to not be all things all the time, which reduces the guilt we feel when we can’t do a million things at once. Sister Queens, I know this is not easy, but I do have a way to help you manage that stress.

It’s all about managing energy — your energy! It is the intention and attention that you’re giving emotionally, physically, and intellectually to yourself and the world.

Let’s start with intention — what is on your Royal agenda today? Is it a board meeting or sales call where the intention is focused on persuasion? Is it a day taking your mom to her doctor’s appointment where the intention is focused on care and love? Is it a day of royal treatment planned for you and a Sister Queen to get massages and focus on self-love? What is your intention for the day? Let’s start there.

Knowing your intention, give that your full attention for the day — and determine the energy needed to achieve it. If you’re looking to persuade, is It powerful, authoritative energy? If you’re with those who need you on a caring, emotional level, does your energy need to focus on patience?

Now, again, I know this isn’t easy! There are a lot of things out there that can hijack your energy. From simple things like drinking too much coffee to bigger things like getting a flat tire on the highway on your way to an important meeting — it only takes one challenge, and your energy can be zapped in an instant. Queens, stop with the caffeine when you need slower-pace energy (you’re welcome)!! And as far as the unexpected, these are known unknowns. Sh*t happens — we do know that. We just don’t know when. Either way, you’ve got this Queens, because Queen Energy is resilient, incredibly powerful, and truly impactful.

Queen Energy is…..

  • Self-Determined
  • Authoritative
  • Unapologetic
  • A Blinding Force
  • Powerful
  • Loving
  • Whatever You Want It To Be!

And regardless of what it is — protect it. How? Well, here’s the best part. There are no new steps to learn, no additional tasks to add to your day. Go back to the start. Focus on your intention and give it your full attention.

You, Queen, are responsible for your Queen Energy. Honor it — it is royal, as are you.

Sincerely,

 

Self-Talk Fit For A Queen

Written by Carrie-Ann Barrow on . Posted in For Women, Bring Out The Queen, Developing Queen Confidence, Personal Development, Professional Development, Self-Awareness. No Comments on Self-Talk Fit For A Queen

Hey Queen,

The words we use matter. And when it comes to feeling (and being) confident in both our personal and professional lives — words matter even more. We want our self-talk to be worthy of royalty! You, Queen, are royal after all!

In Chapter 8 of “The Queen’s Decree,” titled Speak Like a Queen, I focus on the topic of language. The words we use, and the words we allow others to use when speaking with us, matter. They make a significant difference in how we make decisions, how we feel about ourselves, how we present ourselves to others, and ultimately, our confidence. And ladies, what I want for you is Queen confidence. The kind of confidence that speaks before the words even come out and says, “See that Queen over there? Don’t even try to fuck with her.”

So how do we put the idea of Queen confidence into practice? How do the words we currently use stop us from getting that confidence — and how can we shake things up a bit to get it?

Let’s start with an example from a recent coaching session I had with an incredible professional who we’ll call Holly. Holly decided to make a career shift about four years ago into real estate and was absolutely killing it! She was fulfilled and happy. That is, until the negative self-talk would start.

You see royal ones, even when it seems we have it all together, there’s still an inner saboteur voice that visits most of us. You are not alone. It’s normal and it’s okay. What’s important is that you have the tools to adjust, rewrite and overhaul the language you’re using. And if you don’t have them yet, well, we’re going to make sure you get them!

During our session, I asked Holly when the last time was that the negative voice showed up. She explained that while at a realtor networking event, others were talking about their 20+ years, even 30+ years of experience, and the benefit that brings to clients. And she only had four years of experience. She asked herself, “Why would someone want to hire me as their realtor when I only have four?”

I gave Holly some homework. I asked her to make a list of all her accomplishments over the past four years. Then, I asked her to take the statement “I’ve only been a realtor for four years” and turn that into “In only four years as a realtor, I have accomplished…”

And it was magic.

In only four years, she had already received recognition for operating as the number one team in her county and for being one of the top 300 realtors in her region — and she is also a wife, a mother, a soccer coach and so much more. See the difference from “I’ve only been a realtor for four years” to “In only four years I have accomplished…?”

The shift in language, specifically in self-talk, is important. Holly is a benevolent Queen who wouldn’t minimize her partner, children, friends, or probably even a stranger in the grocery store with her language. And now, she is learning to treat herself with the same love and care.

How about you, Queen? How do your words speak the language of self-love? Listen closely, my royal friends, and when that negative self-talk shows up, imagine you’re talking to someone you love deeply and hold in the highest regard. Then, do just that. Give yourself the royal self-love you deserve and speak to yourself like you’re speaking to a Queen. Because – you are!

After all, words matter when talking with royalty. And you, sister Queen, are royal!

 

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