Skip to main content

You Can’t Have Bravery Without Fear

Written by Carrie-Ann Barrow on . Posted in Carrie-Ann Barrow, Determine Your Royal Decree, Developing Queen Confidence, Finding Regal Fulfillment, For Entrepreneurs, For Leaders, For Women, Personal Development, Professional Development, Self-Awareness, Taking Control of Your Kingdom, The Queen’s Decree, Unapologetic Queens.

Hey Queen,

Today, let’s talk about bravery, which you can’t have without fear. I’ve found that when I do the one thing that I fear in the moment – all the other things that I feared become a lot less scary, or otherwise completely irrelevant.

Fear Fuels Bravery

A brilliant business coach named Andie Monet said something that made me appreciate my fear. She said, “you can’t have bravery without fear.” That was great news for me, because when I decided to write a book, I found a lot of old fears coming back, and some new ones emerging.

As I thought about Andie’s words, “You can’t have bravery without fear,” I shifted my l mindset from thinking that fear is a restraint that’s holding me back – to recognize it as a tool that is pushing me to bravery. I imagined the shackles of fear coming off, and replaced that image with a gusting wind pushing me forward taking on my biggest challenges – and I did just that.

Facing One Of My Biggest Fears

Just before the release of my book, “The Queen’s Decree: Finding Purpose, Passion and Prosperity Your Way,” my biggest fear was hurting my parents. In my book, I share stories about my childhood, and some of the stories are difficult memories that are critical to understanding what I needed to do to step into my role as Queen of my own kingdom.

I wanted my parents to read what I had written before I published it. I put it off for months, and as the release came closer, I considered not publishing at all.

My inner Queen was hiding. And yes, I still have to call her out sometimes!

Then, I heard Andie in my mind, and I prioritized my value of bravery. I shared the book with my parents who, over the years, have grown as people, right along with me.

To be clear, the bravery came first in making the firm choice that the book I had poured myself into –and worked on for more than two years – would be published. Once that was done, while still very hard, talking about it with my parents was easier than my fear had led me to believe.

Remember, Queen – fear loses its grip when you realize that you actually need it to get that super satisfying feeling of bravery. You’ve got this, Queen.

 

Let’s Break Up, Social Media – For The Time Being

Written by Carrie-Ann Barrow on . Posted in Taking Control of Your Kingdom, A Queen’s Guide to Self-Care, Bring Out The Queen, Choose Your Velocity, Clarify Your Vision, Determine Your Royal Decree, Developing Queen Confidence, Discover Your Core Values, Finding Purpose, Passion and Prosperity, Finding Regal Fulfillment, Personal Development, Professional Development, Self-Awareness, The Queen’s Decree, The Royal Treatment. No Comments on Let’s Break Up, Social Media – For The Time Being

Hey Queen,

Ever felt like saying, “let’s break up” to social media?

Recently, my teenage son and I were talking about social media – and something he said really struck me.

He talked about how breaks from the social media apps (Instagram, Snapchat, Facebook, TikTok and the like) are important – especially when you’re feeling down – because all you see are ways to become a better version of yourself. And that type of perfection is unattainable.

I thought about how many times I’ve felt that way over the course of my life (even pre-social media), and how sad it is that kids today feel that pressure so soon. There was a time when “Keeping up with the Joneses” was an adult-only worry.

Breaking Up With Social Media Provides Perspective

So, Queens, how do you deal with this pressure?

An important part of stepping into your role as Queen of your kingdom is remembering that you are the only one who can fill it – so there is literally no competition. None. Zilch. Zero. There is only one you.

That means you have no reason to compare yourself for not being “as rich as…,” “as fit as…,” “as successful as…,” or any other “as.” My kingdom can only be ruled by me – and I, just as I am, am perfect for the job.

I remind myself of this when I’m feeling the pressure my son described. And through my modeling as a parent, and conversations about his experiences – I remind him that he has agency over his life. He decides what he invests his time and energy into. And yes, he is so, so right. Breaks are important, as is the deep knowing and believing that he is enough.

Give yourself a break, Queen. You deserve it.